5 life Lessons to learn from Toke Makinwa this year

“It’s not about finding your voice. It’s about giving yourself permission to use your voice” - Kris Carr Click To Tweet

Toke Makinwa is a Nigerian media personality, television host, vlogger, and author. She might not be everyone’s favorite but she’s done pretty much for herself. Her book On Becoming tells of her journey in life – her struggles after her parents died, her marriage and her faith in God.

Hate or like her, she’s not letting whatever life throws get the better part of her. She’s simply living her TM baby girl life.


Here are five life lessons we can all learn from Toke Makinwa:


It doesn’t matter how many times life knocks you down, what matters is your comeback.

If there’s one thing I admire about Toke is her ability to bounce back. She knows how to keep her head up and remain true to her goals. Life has sure dealt her some cards but she’s still standing strong!

After a bad divorce and shaming from the media, she went on to bag some endorsements and even wrote a book titled On Becoming.

Life’s gonna throw some curve balls your way! Never let a bad situation keep you down. Rise above it!

Don’t let the many slip-ups and downtrodden moments get in your way Click To Tweet

Hard work

“Hard work does not necessarily guarantee success, but no success is possible without hard work” – Dr. T.P Chia”

Some will argue that being hard working doesn’t guarantee success. But you’ll agree that every success has a trace of hard work in it. Success doesn’t come easy; you’ll have to work your ass off (well, for some of us).

She’s s symbol of a career driven lady. A real boss lady.


Drive and Passion

As Oprah Winfrey said, “Let passion drive your profession”. To truly enjoy your career, to feel fulfilled in whatever field you find yourself in, you have to have some amount of passion and drive in you.

There’ll be days you want to quit; the day you’ll feel like giving in to naysayers. But, that drive and passion right there? That’s what will give you the nudge and push. As a media personality, Toke is passionate about impacting lives. It’s your duty to educate and touch as many lives as you can. And that’s what she’s all about.

Let the naysayers talk

Oh yes, they’ll talk! They’ll be the ones whispering “you can’t do it”, and then they’ll try so hard to pull you down.

They’ll criticise your every work and misconstrue you. Trust me, there are always naysayers who say it can’t be done. But you know what darling, let them talk! They can’t stop your shine.

If you stop to throw stones at every dog that barks, you won’t reach your destination.

It’s never too late

Who said it’s too late to turn a new leaf? Or pick yourself up from where life knocked you down? Who said you can’t get another job or live the life you so desire after many trials?

Who said you can’t date again after a bad breakup?

Listen up motherland moguls, it’s never too late to live the life you want or to become the lady you hope to become. You have so much passion and talent waiting to be unleashed. There’s so much you can do.

Don’t let the many slip-ups and downtrodden moments get in your way. Just shake it off and pick yourself up.

When life knocks you down (and at some point it will), don’t get a mat and camp there. No!

Rise above it, pick yourself up, learn from your mistakes and do better. Become better.

Know that it’s never too late, let the naysayers talk, follow your drive and passion, work hard and be resilient.

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How to create your 2018 ‘self-worth’ checklist

Constantly, we find ourselves questioning our self-worth. It is so easy to slip into unhappiness and self-doubt.

In 2018 we want our Motherland Moguls to walk around feeling fly and unstoppable because there is a direct relationship between self-worth and living up to one’s full potential. We do not want you to feel any less of yourself.

Rock 2018 by your standards

So, take a look at the year 2018 self-worth checklist:

Do what you like and like what you do

I like the fact that I am no longer where I used to be, but I have loved every step of the way. Recognizing that it needn’t fit into anybody’s expectation of me. Really, there is no yardstick for success.

Success is so personal, it is you deciding what the yardstick should be Click To Tweet

The point is ‘Do what you like, and like what you do’. In making a decision, career choice, a new friend, or whatever. It is a boost of self-worth when you can stand up for your choices every time, and say, I am proud of what I did.

Maintain your lane

It is so tempting to want to be like the other person, but really this is falling short of your authenticity. The real need here is staying in your lane. Bonang Matheba and Toke Makinwa are two different media queens successful in their own rights.

The right motivation is to stand out in your game, not to be like the other person. Don’t feel pressured to be like anybody; it is the easiest way to fall short of who you are and become nervous. You are highly confident in being yourself.

Get your mindset right

Self-worth is not a tangible, it is formed by a mindset. It is not in your realities first. If you settle for less in your thinking, expectations, goals, ambitions, that is you selling yourself short already. Focus on getting your mindset right.

Let affirmations do the talking

Like I said, don’t sell yourself short. Even in words. Don’t feel any less because of your realities. Keep talking the talk, and keep it optimistic, and confident. Affirmations are what we say we are because we believe it.

Set attainable goals

“You cannot coman kee your sef” – (Nigerian pidgin/slang meaning; Don’t put so much pressure on yourself). Setting overwhelming goals can make you sad when you don’t eventually meet-up with your expectations. There is a direct relationship between self-worth and achievements. It is great to set S.M.A.R.T goals.

Find a genuine cheerleader

A little journey down memory lane: In secondary school, I read this book called ‘21 types of negative friends’. It became a game-changer in my life, as it opened my eyes to the fact that friendships can diminish your self-worth.

Friends affect your self-worth. In words, in vibes, in how they treat you. As humans, we are constantly needing affirmations, support, and good vibes to make us feel great. What are you without a friend that doesn’t hand you that? You cannot be at your best.

Let your light so Shine

Letting your light so shine is a reminder that you have it. Don’t sell yourself short. You are doing this not for anyone, but for yourself. In being the light, you amaze yourself, and you keep your confidence bar high.

Don’t attach your self-worth to material things

They are called material things for a reason. Beware that your money, association, and possession can be easily lost. Think about it; If you lose it all would you feel any less? Are you thick because you are wearing such and such thing or hanging with such and such person or receiving a ton of compliments? Remember self-worth is a mindset. Even in a sack bag feel as great as when you are in a Ferrari. Don’t feel great because of material stuff.

Now that you have your self-worth checklist, you are ready to nail your 2018.