Happy New year Motherland Moguls!
2018 was a year filled with events and lessons for me. So, I thought I would share with you some of the lessons learned that apply to life, career, and business.
Life is full of surprises and often take unexpected turns. Our successes are a result of how well we respond and adapt to the life changes. My hope this year is that we are all able to embrace change and let go of what is holding us back.
Welcome to 2019!
Now let’s talk about the shit you need to leave in 2018. You don’t need that baggage with you in 2019!
[bctt tweet=”Here are 5 habits you need to let go of this year #leavethatshitin2018″ username=”SheLeadsAfrica”]
Resenting others
Nothing good comes from resenting others. I’m telling you this as someone who is guilty of holding grudges for long periods of time.
I resented the person who took this picture for a while. I blamed them for making me miserable. I wished them all the bad luck in the world because I felt they were somehow the origin of everything bad happening in my life (and it wasn’t the case).
I don’t resent them anymore and I am so much happier for it. Don’t get me wrong, I still highly dislike this person, but as soon as I was able to refocus the time and energy I was spending brooding over the situation, amazing things started happening.
Nothing good ever comes from resenting others. Take it from a champion in the resentment Olympics. #LeaveThatShitIn2018
Snoozing your life away
I am usually pretty good at waking up early and getting on with my day. But every so often I think that I could do with “5 more minutes” of sleep and hit the snooze button for the next 2 hours.
The problem?
When you snooze, you not only wake up more tired than you initially were, but you then spend your entire day playing catch up. You waste time, miss opportunities, and get caught up in a vicious circle. The same is true for life.
I didn’t get to see my grandmother one last time because of this viscous snoozing circle I had slipped in. So now, I try my best to make things happen ASAP.
One of the best trips I had this year was possible because I did not snooze (when I really wanted to). I was able to discover part of Cape Verde, meet great people, and have an amazing experience.
Don’t postpone things you can do now.
Finish (or start) that degree you have been thinking about for so long. Take that art class. Visit with your friends and family. Explore the world. Launch that business.
And when that thing you want to do seems impossible, just remember that Rome was not built in a day, it was built one stone at the time. (And stop snoozing that alarm clock!)
You snooze you lose. #LeaveThatShitIn2018
Being a technology zombie
Technology is wonderful. It enables us to take great selfies (and groupies) and more importantly it enables us to connect with each other and the world.
We, however, have to be very careful. Technology is a double-edged sword. It can be a nice distraction. But it is a distraction nonetheless. It is a distraction that turns us into shallow versions of ourselves.
I took this picture while I was waiting for my car to get fixed. And I was so glad to have my phone with me at the time. It made the wait so much more enjoyable.
But more and more I find myself scrolling on my social media feed while I’m on the phone or watching TV.
I like to think that technology is not the boss of me. But I have noticed lately that I miss pieces of conversations, movies, and I waste time that could be put to better use because of it.
[bctt tweet=”Be present. Connect with intention. Don’t be a tech zombie. #LeaveThatShitIn2018″ username=”SheLeadsAfrica”]
I feel this negatively affects the quality of my relationships. It turns me into a passive, absent-minded, and monosyllabic individual. And this is not the type of person or friend I want to be.
I want to be a friend that remembers what we talked about. That friend who is attentive, present and listens actively and with intention.
The friends we have and the relationships we build are what make life interesting and beautiful. So, we owe it to each other to be mindful, engaged, and attentive.
Be present. Connect with intention. Don’t be a tech zombie. #LeaveThatShitIn2018
Letting fear cloud your judgment
We often think of fear as this scary monster that makes us do crazy things. But more often than not, fear comes posing as a gentle and wise friend that has your best interest at heart.
Fear is eloquent and charismatic. Fear is (seemingly) insightful. Fear is convincing. In fact, Fear is so convincing that it will have you believe that your neighbor must be dangerous since they do not look like you. It will convince you to stay quiet in the face of injustice.
It will convince you that putting your head in the sand is the best way to solve your problems.
I have been there. Fear had me paralyzed. It made me watch a personal situation getting worse and worse and interpret anything as a sign of improvement.
I was very fortunate at that time to have a great friend who guided me through this fog of fear. But sometimes, you have to be your own guide and ask yourself: what would I tell a friend in the same situation?
Don’t let fear cloud your judgment. Be your own friend. Take fear out of the equation. #LeaveThatShitIn2018
Traveling someone else’s journey
When we are young, it is the responsibility of our parents, our family, (and, to some extent, our community) to prepare us for life. They make choices for us, take decisions about our activities, our lifestyle, and our beliefs.
They do this hoping that we will be best prepared for adulthood, that we will be equipped to make our own choices and take our own decisions when the time comes. And for this, we should all be grateful.
At some point, however, we have to be masters of our own destiny. Being told what to do is reassuring but it deprives us of the essential ability that is self-determination. When we are used to being told what to do, we often forget to stray out of the pre-established path and look for our own purpose.
You are different and unique. And applying other people’s goals and expectations for your life will only result in heartbreak. Do not watch your life pass by from the passenger seat while wishing you were heading towards a different destination.
You are free to do anything. So, take charge and know when it is time to get out of the car and pave your own way. Don’t be afraid to say no and be comfortable traveling alone (for a little while at least).
This is an adventure. Your adventure. It might be intimidating and scary, but it will definitely be interesting and worthwhile.
Be the driver (and engineer) of your journey. Build your own path. Don’t be a passenger to your life. #LeaveThatShitIn2018
Enjoy the New Year.
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