Take charge of your finances with this budget template
[bctt tweet=”Budgeting is not difficult, but sticking to the budget is where discipline comes in” username=”SheLeadsAfrica”] Most young women in their 20s and early 30s dream about quitting their jobs and starting their dream businesses. But if you ask them how they manage their salary, you will be met with “uuumms” and “eeers”. How will you manage your business income, expenses and plans of you can’t manage your salary? Welcome to feminancial management! As women, we need to stop being controlled by our finances and take charge of it! Let’s get started with 5 easy tips to begin taking charge of our money. 1. Budget How many sisters budget their finances? Let’s talk about Achieng. Achieng is 26 years old. She works in a bank and her career is just starting to take off. Achieng lives from hand to mouth waiting for her paycheck at the end of each month. She spends on hair (with the natural hair trending, products are not cheap hehe!), clothes, social hangouts and such like expenses. Come one week before pay day, she is already broke, with just enough cash to last her till exactly payday. Does Achieng budget her salary? No. Does she track her expenditure? No. Has she allocated some money for investments or savings? No. Her reason will be she just earns enough for her upkeep. Once she’s promoted or gets a better paying job, she will start saving. Chances are she will not. Actually, no, she won’t save. What am I saying here in short? Budget your income. Distinguish between your “wants” and “needs”. You want that designer bag, you don’t need it! Budget “Savings” as your first expense in your budget. 2. Discipline Once you budget your finances, you need the discipline to stick to the budget. Meet our other sister, Fatma. Fatma is a 24 year old entrepreneur. She does online jobs and her income is intermittent. Once she gets paid, what does she do? Remember that nice dress she saw in that shop? She buys it and spends and spends and spends till she is broke and waits for the next gig to come along. The truth is, budgeting is not difficult, but sticking to the budget is where the rubber meets the road. That’s where discipline comes in. Track and monitor your expenses on a daily or weekly basis to help you stick to the budget. Separate your finances as per your budget e.g. if it’s bills, pay them immediately your salary comes in, if it’s savings, put up a standing order to a separate Savings account Remind yourself of the target, create a board even with pictures of your goal to keep you focused. 3. Goals Have I told you about Maame? Maame is a 30 year old stay-at-home mum. She recently had her second baby and can’t wait to shed the baby weight. What’s her goal? To shed off 20 Kilograms. What is she doing about it? Nothing! What gyms or exercising videos has she researched on to start her off? None. Doesn’t that look like most of us making New Year resolutions? It’s definitely me. We make plans in our head about our financial goals but we don’t put in the work needed to reach those goals. After a few months, we’ve forgotten all about it or have a myriad of excuses on why we couldn’t attain our goals. What can we do about that? Write down your goals. Break it down into sub-goals with time frames. Lastly be realistic about your goals otherwise you will get discouraged along the way and quit. [bctt tweet=”Keeping up with the Kardashians is great but keep up with news and current trends too” username=”SheLeadsAfrica”] Knowledge Meet Bola, a 32 year old doctor. She is a high-flying woman with the world at her feet earning a six figure salary and living the life. What investments has she made since she started working 8 years ago? You guessed right! None! Why? She doesn’t know where to start in investments. Is it real estate or stocks? She has no clue which direction to take. Most young women know a lot about their field in careers but no zilch about investments. But here is a chance to start somewhere Find a field of investments that interests you, and research on it. Make Google your friend. Mentors –talk to someone older, not even necessarily in your field who can guide you and perhaps you can learn from their success and failures. Keep up to date with current trends. Keeping up with the Kardashians is great but keeping up with news and current trends and innovations will help you a huge deal. Time Say hello to Esihle. Esihle is a pretty 23 year old in her first job after university. Esihle now has the “financial independence” she has been waiting for and no longer has to ask her parents for money. So where does she spend her free time? Social media, just stalking her friend’s timelines seeing what they have been up to, posting photos on Instagram with hundreds of filters and catching up with her friends over drinks after a hectic week of work or just catching up with the latest series or movies. According to research, the average millennial spends 9 hours a day on social platforms. How many years did she spend in the university learning about let’s say Journalism? About four years. How many hours does she spend learning about something financial related? Well, not enough. If she took four years to study in University and can afford to spend 9 hours on social platforms, how much more informed can she be if she spent one hour learning about investment opportunities like stocks for example each day? The point is we become empowered when we are more knowledgeable. We become knowledgeable when read and learn. We can only read and learn when we create time to do it! *Drops mic! What are you waiting for? Get empowered! 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5 non-fiction novels you should be reading
The right book can be like the big sister you never asked for who can dispense really good advice with no judgment. The books we read can definitely shape and influence us, whether you’re looking for professional tips or just reading for the giggles. Roald Dahl said it best, ‘If you’re going to get anywhere in life you have to read a lot of books‘. Here are my 5 picks for books that will leave you crying, laughing and inspired. Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns) by Mindy Kaling “…write your own part. It is the only way I’ve gotten anywhere. It is much harder work, but sometimes you have to take destiny into your own hands. It forces you to think about what your strengths really are, and once you find them, you can showcase them, and no one can stop you.” For the Motherland Mogul who isn’t shy to speak up, has a wicked sense of humour and does not believe in following the traditional path. Mindy Kaling is witty, entertaining and more importantly, an example of how you can be your own heroine. The experiences detailed in her book are a great way to feel motivated into taking your career path into your hands. When the mould isn’t set for you, you can say screw it and make your own path. Year of Yes by Shonda Rhimes “Dreams are lovely. But they are just dreams. Fleeting, ephemeral. Pretty. But dreams do not come true just because you dream them. It’s hard work that makes things happen. It’s hard work that creates change.” For the Motherland Mogul who needs to get out of her comfort zone. We all know Shonda Rhimes is the goddess of television, how can she not be? As the titan behind the TGIT shows (Scandal, Grey’s Anatomy, How to Get Away with Murder and the Catch), she has revolutionized television. Her shows have sparked interesting conversations and given young women bad ass female characters who inspire us in various ways. Year of Yes dares you to work hard, step out of you comfort zone and love yourself. So whether you need to ask for that raise or have been feeling like you are in a rut, you can definitely be inspired by this book to step up your game and challenge yourself to live a more fulfilling life. We Should All Be Feminists by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie “Some people ask: ‘Why the word feminist? Why not just say you are a believer in human rights, or something like that?’ Because that would be … a way of pretending that it was not women who have, for centuries, been excluded. It would be a way of denying that the problem of gender targets women.” For the Motherland Mogul who needs a reminder of how awesome being a woman is. Now we all know a book list would not be complete without our soul sister Chimamanda. This book is based off her inspirational TED talk which also featured as part of Beyonce’s **Flawless** gaining her worldwide acclaim and attention. This book is ideal to gain an understanding of feminism from an African point of view. It may also be a great read for those who don’t truly understand what feminism is and how important it is in today’s modern society. Hidden Figures: The American Dream and the Untold Story of the Black Women Mathematicians Who Helped Win the Space Race by Margot Lee Shetterly “Their dark skin, their gender, their economic status–none of those were acceptable excuses for not giving the fullest rein to their imaginations and ambitions.” For the Motherland Mogul who needs some inspiration. If you have not watched Hidden Figures, you are doing yourself the greatest disservice ever. Reading the book? Just as necessary. The biography details the discrimination faced by the three mathematicians who worked as human computers at NASA. Dealing with racism and sexism, it highlights how intersectional oppression is an experience faced by black women in the workplace. It’s a great read for when you feel unappreciated in the workplace or when you face challenges like racism and sexism. This story can definitely motivate you to persist beyond the challenges that can suppress your talents and skills. Born a Crime: Stories From a South African Childhood by Trevor Noah “I don’t regret anything I’ve ever done in life, any choice that I’ve made. But I’m consumed with regret for the things I didn’t do, the choices I didn’t make, the things I didn’t say. We spend so much time being afraid of failure, afraid of rejection. But regret is the thing we should fear most. Failure is an answer. Rejection is an answer. Regret is an eternal question you will never have the answer to.” For the Motherland Mogul whose past is key to defining her future. Reading this book felt like reading a love letter to Trevor Noah’s mom, his respect and adoration for her are clear. The description of his upbringing as a mixed race child during the Apartheid era showed her resilience and strength that motivated him to become the man he is today. Very often we take our experiences for granted, yet they can shape our career and personal choices. Life is about pushing through the hard times, finding pride in who we are and taking that leap no matter how scary.
7 things to do when you’re in a career limbo
[bctt tweet=”Here are 7 things you can do when you’re in a career limbo and are this close to giving up” username=”SheLeadsAfrica”] Too many people feel like they’re in a dead-end job or that their career is just not taking off like they expected. Feeling stuck, unfulfilled and unmotivated has to really suck. The good news is there’s always a solution to every problem out there. Here are seven things you can do when you’re in a career limbo and feel like giving up: 1. Do something out of the ordinary Try out new things and discover new interests. You need a different head space to realign yourself with your professional goals. Have these changed? Taking a breather can help you decide if you need a different strategy or simply want to try something different like switching to a new company or even a new career. 2. Improve on your skill set Perhaps, the reason why you feel like your career isn’t really moving forward is because you haven’t actually put in the effort to improve on yourself. Put in the time and effort to build your skills via online courses, training, self-study, workshops etc. Working on yourself is always an advantage. Sometime soon, someone will be sure to take notice. And if they don’t, tell them. 3. Be prepared to take risks This could mean taking a risk by changing your method of working. Perhaps, you have refused to move with the times whilst everyone else is finding advanced ways of getting their work done and moving up the corporate ladder. 4. Go to your mentor At this stage, if you already have a mentor that you reach out to from time to time, be prepared to hear some hard truths. There are certain things you should be doing to stand out which may be lacking that your mentor will point out to you. If you don’t have one, you know what to do. Look for someone you admire for their professional ethic and successful career in a field related to yours. There must be things that you can emulate from their story and apply to your own career to get you out of the rut. 5. Take on leadership responsibility One way to get a promotion is through leadership. Can colleagues look up to you for guidance and maturity in dealing with challenges? Are you one to look out for the team as a whole? Leadership is about putting yourself out there and motivating others to do their best. If you’re seen as a leader, you’ll eventually be given additional responsibility which can move you into new assignments, opportunities and promotion. [bctt tweet=”You have the power to modify your professional game” username=”SheLeadsAfrica”] 6. Re-invent yourself Social media can be a great tool to help you achieve this. You have the power to modify your professional game. Through channels like LinkedIn, Facebook and Twitter you can sell yourself by highlighting your interests and aspirations. In the workplace as well, you can re-invent yourself by getting involved in things that will expose you to new areas. 7. Express your concerns to your manager or supervisor The thought of approaching your superior about your feeling stagnant within the organization might be a bit awkward or scary. However, they could help you figure out what opportunities exist, what areas you need to put more effort in or simply tell you why things just aren’t moving at the moment. After giving some of these your best shot, something’s gotta give. Good luck in getting your career back on track. We have faith in you.
5 things to do to be successful in your career
[bctt tweet=”Career success doesn’t come easy, Chikodi Abani shares 5 things to change for a successful career” username=”SheLeadsAfrica”] We all want to be successful in our chosen fields –be it as a writer, actor, entrepreneur, fitness trainer, media consultant, or radio presenter. We all strive to be among the top 5. It’s not enough to dream success, you can’t aim for success while you dilly-dally. You can’t say you’ll lose a few pounds while you keep stuffing yourself up every day. Something’s got to change –be it your thinking or environment. You can’t keep doing the same thing and hope to get a different result. It doesn’t work that way. If you want a different result, do something different. Success is not something you attain by just dreaming. In the words of Shonda Rimes “Dreams are lovely. But they are just dreams. Fleeting, ephemeral, pretty. But dreams do not come true just because you dream them. It’s hard work that makes things happen. It’s hard work that creates change.” In other words, hard work is essential to success. Attitude/mind-set You are what you think! Ever paid attention to the thoughts running through your mind? Are you filled with so much negativity that you can’t stop to harbor one positive thought? There are no shortcuts to success -it’s tiring and sometimes lonely. Occasionally you will feel like you’re headed somewhere, other times you’ll feel like you’re on the wrong bus. In the journey of success, attitude matters. Maintaining a positive attitude when your emotions are all jumbled up helps. You won’t always feel upbeat and energetic; you will feel like quitting sometimes. Ever wondered why lifestyle coaches and motivational speakers stress on positivity. It’s because one small positive affirmation goes a long way. Get your ass off/leave your comfort zone A friend told me that he will like to know me. I found it funny because he knows me. He laughed and added, “I know you. And I want to believe it when you set out to do something because you are too relaxed.” That hit me really hard. Several times I dreamed up an idea out of excitement only to let it go down the drain. Other times, I set out do something only to let procrastination get in my way. How often do we make up our minds to do something only to get stuck in our comfort zone? We say we’ll do this or that but we stop before we even begin. Why? Because we’re so scared that we’ll rather sit and wait for the ‘right’ time or when the coast is clear before we step out. I love analyzing and thinking through a plan. It’s good. But oftentimes we indulge in so much thinking and analyzing that hesitation begins to creep in. You have got to stop over thinking, over analyzing, second guessing and self-doubting yourself. Just get on the train. [bctt tweet=”We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” username=”SheLeadsAfrica”] Be resilient According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, resilience is the ability to become strong, healthy, or successful again after something bad happens. You can’t be successful if you’re not resilient. Things will not always go your way; you’ll fail, fall and feel miserable. You have to have an insatiable desire to pursue your dreams despite the obstacles surrounding it. No matter how many times you fail, or how often you make a ‘fool’ of yourself, get back on track. It doesn’t matter how many times you fall, what matters is how many times you get up and get going. Keep learning We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit. Most people tend to settle once they get that job or start up that business. They shut the doors to grooming or improving themselves. University days are over, business is flourishing. There’s no need to sharpen your skills, right? Wrong. If you want to stand out, you must be willing to work on yourself at all times. How do you think people like Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Omotola or Oprah got to where they are? It’s because they worked on their craft. Ask renowned medical doctors or award winning writers and actors, they will tell you how much time they invest in learning. We are surrounded with so many resources to become better people and thanks to technology; you don’t even have to be in a classroom. With your smartphone, you can have access to unlimited knowledge on a wide range of topics. We live in a dynamic world so there’s the need to stay up-to-date. Do away with distractions “Lack of direction, not lack of time is the problem. We all have twenty-four hours days” – Zig Ziglar Successful people manage their time wisely. Time management is linked to success. It is difficult to attain success if you spend your time on the wrong people or things. Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines distraction as “something that makes it difficult to think or pay attention”. To be successful in your career, you should be willing to set aside your distractions – TV, gadgets, people, social media…; whatever is diverting your attention from your desired goal.
Three hacks to help you beat procrastination
[bctt tweet=”Serial procrastinator? You’ll need these 3 hacks to help you out when procrastination hits” via=”no”] We’ve all had those days. Ones where we just can’t seem to get our fingers moving on our keyboards or can’t find the words for that e-mail. Here are three hacks to helping you save time when procrastination hits. 1. Create keyboard shortcuts Spent all morning procrastinating? Save time by creating shortcuts when texting on your Samsung phone. Use a text snippet expander like the TextExpander custom keyboard to reduce time when sending those bulk e-mails. What’s the tick? Set up shorthand to stand in for a longer text. For example, if you text “eml” your full personal email address would appear. Always signing off with the same sentences? Cut out all that time by setting up a snippet. 2. Scanning business cards and receipts Make up for the time spent procrastinating by scanning your business cards, instead of manually inputting them into your Samsung phone. Save the time you spend cleaning out those nasty receipts from the bottom of your purse and the time you would spend scanning and filing them. ScanBizCards is an app from the Galaxy Apps store that lets you scan business cards on the spot. 3. Download work-related podcasts That procrastination time might as well be well spent. If you’re not going to type that e-mail, then you might as well be retaining some skills to keep you in the hustle. Use your off time to listen to business-related podcasts. Take your time to listen to a few and then pick your favourite; listen to it while you’re scrolling through Instagram or taking that 3:00pm snack break. We recommend the 500 Startups podcast; it’s filled with stories and lessons from entrepreneurs who have made that side hustle their full time hustle. Keep these three tricks in hand to make up for yesterday’s binge watch of Big Little Lies. Sponsored post
Overachiever, are you going somewhere? Or are you stuck in the same place?
[bctt tweet=”My intense focus was exhausting to me & to my family who became casualties in my drive for success” via=”no”] Goals are meant to fulfill the purpose of helping us feel as if our actions are leading us towards something –whatever we have decided that to be. Worst case scenario? Without goals, you become a wandering nothing with no purpose and no happiness and maybe no friends. This is probably a tad dramatic but this was definitely how I felt until fairly recently. Seeing the goal as the be all, end all I’ve always been a textbook overachiever, in goal setting overdrive. From as early on as primary school I was ready and waiting to climb “that” ladder to the top. I remember in grade 7, my dad was helping me put the finishing touches on my economics and management studies project and we were having a printing mishap. The colours on the cover page were not coming out right, despite multiple attempts and shaking of the printer cartridge. After the fourth attempt failed, according to my standards, I burst into tears. My dad tried to console me by (rightly) suggesting that no one knew what the cover was meant to look like so it didn’t really matter how the colours printed. But I was inconsolable. And I cried for what felt like forever, real time 35 minutes. It really mattered to me what colour my cover page was. The colour of my cover page was linked to the success of this project, this subject, this grade, getting into high school. Life. I think at this point we can all agree that I was having an unhealthy relationship with my goals. Allowing a minor mishap to be equivalent to not meeting the goal could surely not be sustainable. Failure providing perspective Despite the cover page saga, I got into the high school I wanted and continued to pressurize myself to achieve – now focusing on university. My intense focus was exhausting, not only to me but also to my parents and sister who became casualties in my drive for success. I don’t think I fully realised my capacity to be crazy until university came and things seemed to slow down a bit. I tasted failure and it wasn’t all that bad. I failed my first economics test in my first semester of my commerce degree and you know what? I still passed the course. And got the degree. I started understanding that failing at things did not mean that failure was all you could taste. Rather failure can help you realise that things don’t fall apart if everything doesn’t go according to plan. The freedom of letting go I realised (very slowly I might add) that blind fixation to my goals was not necessary. Failure didn’t mean that everything was going to fall to the wayside. Rather, I learnt that if I wanted something there was more than one way to get it. More importantly, I realised that everything doesn’t need to always work out. Having the goal can be important but not having it can be just as valuable. [bctt tweet=”Failure isn’t the end, I learnt that if I wanted something there was more than one way to get it” username=”SheLeadsAfrica”] Because of my unhealthy relationship with goals, it felt so good to let go of always focusing on the next step. We tend to always be driven to keep moving forward but sometimes it is really nice to stand still and just take it all in. Open your mind I have learnt that sometimes not having a plan is a plan in and of itself. Things work out and you have to just trust that and you will be surprised by the opportunities that arise. Be open minded to it rather than having your head so tucked into your goal book that you miss something potentially greater. Through being more open I have found that there are wonderful memories and days that await me. And a lot less tears and self-imposed pressure. I’m not saying don’t have goals. Have them and dream a big dream! But don’t blindly follow them. Be aware of other things going on and maybe you’ll go down an unexpected but also very happy path. [bctt tweet=”Maybe everything will not come crumbling down if you don’t know the next step” username=”SheLeadsAfrica”] Ah, I still panic! I still have moments of panic when I realise I don’t have my next step concreted. But I also have days of absolute freedom when I think that anything could happen. Maybe everything will not come crumbling down if you don’t know the next step. And even if it does, I think you are stronger than you think. You can withstand a little bit of crumbling. You are strong.
How you can use your Samsung phone to reach your goals faster
Procrastination got you down? Can’t stop scrolling 30 weeks back on your friend’s brother’s University friend’s girlfriend’s Instagram profile? Know every single pose Beyonce has done during pregnancy? Have you seen every single comedy skit on every single Nigerian comedy page and now you’re looking for new countries to laugh at? If this is you, please raise your hand. We’ve pulled together three great tips to help you keep the ball rolling even when you may want to keep scrolling. Even better they all can be done using your phone. 1. Set daily goals An oldie but a goodie. We at SLA are HUGE fans of daily goals. So much so that we have to send them to our managers in the morning with a check-in and then report back with a check-out at the end of the day. Our trick to stay on track? Before sending over our goals, we open the notepad on our Samsung phones and jot down a rough draft of our goals before sending over the final copy. This helps us stay on track to make sure we’ve got our content ready to share with you. If you forget to jot down your daily goals, set an alarm on your phone. Once you get in the habit, it becomes habitual and easier to meet them. 2. The 15-minute rule “This is a tomorrow problem”…my favourite expression. When I’m procrastinating something to tomorrow, this is what I tell myself. How do I beat it? The 15-minute rule. That tricky task you haven’t been able to get to has met its match. Take out your Samsung phone and set an alarm for 15 minutes. Tell yourself that you’ll do nothing else for those 15 minutes and get to work. You’ll find once those 15 minutes are up the ball will be rolling; you won’t even notice the alarm and keep on the task at hand. Procrastination – 0, You – 1. 3. Take advantage of your commute Ahh, what a joy, the morning commute! If that 30-minute bus ride turns into an hour, use that time wisely. Catch up on those e-mails from yesterday, use this time to write down your daily goals or start brainstorming about the afternoon’s meeting. If you keep a few tricks up your sleeve to help with those down days, you’ll be set to rise above your procrastination. Sponsored post
Negotiation 101 for dummies
[bctt tweet=”You’ll be winning at negotiations even if you’re no good it with these tips” username=”SheLeadsAfrica”] You have been in negotiations for quite some time already. No matter how hard you try, you are confronted by a silent wall every time you attempt to find anything about the other party. Communication is not passing through and you only know your position. Worse, the tension is building up and your opponent is becoming more aggressive by the minute. What do you do? You might be tempted to give up, to stay on your position, or to concede to their requests. However, none of these options will give you what you need. This article will present you with tools to ease into negotiations and achieve a satisfactory agreement. Never state, always ask Asking questions is a way to educate and seek information. By asking questions, you show a willingness to take the other party’s opinion into consideration. You also communicate your desire to understand their situation. Questions are also a wonderful tool to make them understand your own position. Ask them what they would do in your place. Ask them hypothetical questions like, “What if I did exactly what you asked, what would be the consequences that I will face?”. It will help put their demands in perspective and show how realistic their proposal is. The power of silence Silence, when used right, is a very powerful tool it shows that you are listening and paying attention to what is being said. When silent, do not try to think about what you are going to say next or how to counter their current argument. Focus on what is being said and on making sure you have a proper understanding of the situation. When you ask a question, make sure you refrain from commenting or saying anything at all until you receive a full answer. By staying silent, you are pushing them to elaborate on what was said. This is an effective way to gather as many details as possible on an issue. Silence makes people nervous and compelled to fill in the absence of noise. The more comfortable you are with being silent the better negotiation ninja you will become. Forget about bottom lines The purpose of setting a bottom line is to protect your interest by making sure that the outcome of a negotiation will never go above what you are willing to concede. By setting a bottom line you will consider only one scenario as the least acceptable one. However, the costs of considering a unique outcome greatly outweigh the benefits of a bottom line. A bottom line cannot be changed and therefore lacks in flexibility. It will keep you away from bad deals as well as wise deals. It will also limit the influx of creative input and the making of imaginative solutions. A bottom line will cut short discussions without solving anything. Developing your best alternative Negotiating power is gained when the option of not reaching an agreement is as or more appealing than the option of reaching it. Before entering any discussion, you must think about the possibility of not reaching an agreement. What will you do if negotiations are not conclusive? What is your best alternative to negotiations? Thinking about the possible failure of discussions will help make the most out of your situation. It is, therefore, important to prepare yourself. Take a moment to brainstorm all possible alternatives to the negotiations. Out of all the ideas generated, choose a few to develop into concrete plans. Then assess which out of the developed plans is the best for your situation and select your best alternative. The more attractive the alternative, the more power you will have during the negotiations. A powerful best alternative should make you want to call off negotiations before they even started. Dismantling the other side’s best alternative Part of your preparation will involve understanding the other party. You need to gain as much information as possible on their motivations, interest, and above all, you will need to know what their best alternative is. Sometimes, if not readily available, the information will have to be obtained during the discussion process. Once you have acquired all the knowledge you need, you have to ask yourself: “Is their best alternative attractive? Is it easily attainable? Is it realistic?” If the answer to all three questions is no, then you have all negotiating powers on your side. If the answer to all three questions is yes, you will have to consider taking actions that will decrease the attractiveness of their best alternative. Most frequently, the answers are a combination of yes and no. If it is your case, you will not only have to show that your alternative is more attractive to you than theirs is to them, but also explain why their best alternative might not be the best solution. Always keep in mind that the easier it is to walk away from the discussion, the more negotiating power you hold.
5 lessons learnt from Solange Knowles
[bctt tweet=”Get a healthy dose of motivation courtesy of Solange Knowles ” username=”SheLeadsAfrica”] Solange Knowles’ recent album, “A Seat at the Table”, provides commentary on her experiences as a black woman in America and places her amongst the most talented artists of this generation. I’ve played the album over and over again since it came out, and each time I feel more empowered and encouraged as a young woman. Her melodies are woven in with stories that we can all take inspiration and a little guidance from. Here the 5 things I’ve learnt from “A Seat at the Table”: 1. “But I’m not really allowed to be mad.” It takes a lot of restraint to sing in a cool silky voice when your songs speak out about the injustices you’ve experienced because of the colour of your skin, or when you’re trying to work through the hurt and anger you feel. We often face a conflict as women; do we raise our voices and risk being labelled as loud and angry, or remain quiet with our voices barely heard. How do we effectively get our message across without coming off as the ‘angry black woman’ when we disagree with someone? I’ve come to find that people are more attentive when you speak in a composed, self-possessed voice, with your words carefully thought out. This way, you avoid hurling insults and jabs that do nothing but foster more resentment. 2. “Ain’t no apologizing for all the things you want.” Have you ever been told that your strong opinion or confidence is too intimidating? Or, God forbid, that a woman who is self-reliant and self-assured won’t find a husband? Being a Motherland Mogul means we know what we want and we go out and get it. Being labelled bossy or a control freak is the side effects of being a badass who knows her business and herself. The negative labels from the naysayers shouldn’t deter you from you doing what you want, but rather should drive you to work hard and be proud of how much you have achieved. 3. “Fall in your ways, so you can wake up and rise” Trust your intuition. That little voice in your head, she knows what’s up. Trust your instincts, who knows what glorious journeys they will put you on. When you take the time to listen to your intuition the challenges to realising your goals become minor obstacles because you know where you’re going. Your gut is your compass and it doesn’t hurt to follow it. Don’t discredit your feelings; ask yourself why you feel a certain type of way, are you content, are you doing what you love? How you feel internally shows in what you put out to the world so self-reflection and assessment will foster a more creative, intuitive and stronger you, becoming a more positive force in what you do. 4. “Be weary of the ways of the world” Have the difficult conversations. We are living in a time when people are so divided on a myriad of political and social issues. The instinct is to avoid these debates because engaging could ruffle feathers, bring friendships to question or have you never wanting to attend another family gathering. But how do we create and foster change if we don’t ask the hard questions and challenge each other? Part of this is listening to what others have to say, even when you struggle to agree or even understand their point of view. 5. “Don’t let anybody steal your magic” Celebrate yourself and your success. You’ve got a lot to be proud about, from large milestones such as graduation or a new job to the small things like finally getting to the gym. We are who we are, we’ve gotten here whether it is through chance or some detailed planning. The people and experiences we have encountered have such a profound role in shaping our ideologies and path. So don’t take it for granted. Don’t think your path is less significant because it is different from that of your friends and family. You are your own success story and appreciating that is one of the best ways to take care of yourself and keep you pushing for more.
Career Lessons from Toolz
Tolu Oniru (popularly known as Toolz) is a big name in the Nigerian media industry. She was born into the royal Oniru family. Toolz is an on-air personality, talk show host and radio presenter. Currently, Toolz hosts The Midday Show on Beats 99.9 Fm and anchors her show called The Juice. Everyone knows she is one of the best when it comes to radio presenting. But what exactly sets her apart from her colleagues? What drives her? How has she being able to create a name for herself in the media industry over the last few years? Here are four career lessons we can learn from her: Hard work “Hard work does not necessarily guarantee success, but no success is possible without hard work.” – Dr T.P. Chia While hard work might not necessarily guarantee your success; it definitely improves your chances of being successful in your career. I define it “as that extra effort you put into achieving your desired goal.” Toolz has carved a niche for herself, created a name and built her image through her relentless effort and hard work. Be passionate about your work “Working hard for something we don’t care about is called stress; working hard for something we love is called passion.” – Simon Sinek The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines passion as “a strong feeling of enthusiasm or excitement for something or about doing something.” Passion for one’s work goes a long way in having a successful career. Toolz’s passion for celebrities, entertainment, music, and media has helped grow her career. She loves what she does and she makes sure she puts her best into it. Whether she’s airing the Midday show or anchoring the juice, you can tell from how enthusiastic she is about her job from the way she relates with her audience. Whatever career path you find yourself in, ensure that you have a passion for your work and use it as a source of motivation and direction. Be willing to start There are so many ‘what ifs’ in the career field. “What if things go wrong? What if I am not cut out for this? What if I make a mistake on air?” I am guilty of this habit too; I worry about the ‘what ifs’ before giving myself a chance to start. Before Toolz moved back to Nigeria, she worked with MTV Europe and Walt Disney pictures. These two companies gave her the confidence she needed to go far in her career. In an interview with The Daily Mail, she talked about how her interest in broadcasting grew as she worked at a radio station in London. That prompted her movement to Lagos in 2009. So no matter what career path you are aiming for, give yourself a chance to start. You will be surprised how far you will go. “If you take another step, and another, you will be surprised to know how far you can go from the point you thought was the end.” Have a support system According to socialwork.buffalo.edu, a support system refers to “a network of people- friends, family, and peers that we can turn to for emotional and practical support.” In an excerpt from her interview with The Daily Mail, Toolz said, “my family have been supportive, but they don’t really get involved – my father wanted me to be a doctor/lawyer, so he wasn’t particularly thrilled with my decision to get into entertainment. Now he sees me on TV, in magazines, hears me on radio and he respects how hard I have worked.” Having a good support system goes a long way in building one’s career. They are the people who encourage, support and stand by your side; they do not give up on you. In this present time where people seem to burn out easily, having a strong support system can help keep you going even when you want to give up.