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“You yourself, as much as anybody in the universe, deserve your love and affection.”- Buddha

Loving oneself is one of the most profound and yet also most difficult things to accomplish- it takes practice, patience, unlearning old ways of being and forming a new understanding of who you are as a person.

This is a journey I have personally been on for the longest time, I still find the need to remind myself to practice self-love even after reading and listening to tons of material on it. The truth is that practicing self-love is a lot like practicing good hygiene- it must become a daily ritual.

For those new to this incredible journey or for those looking for a slight reminder of what it means to love oneself, here are a few TEDx talks to inspire you, to love you.

Caroline McHugh: The art of being yourself

The message from Caroline in this talk is simple; your individuality is your greatest gift. You weren’t put on earth to be a cheap imitation of anyone else, you were put here simply to be yourself.

Caira Lee: I search for it blinded – the power of self-love and self-esteem

In this TEDx talk, Caira Lee, an award-winning slam poet uses her gift teach us about the power of self-love through her own personal story.

Marisa Peer: “I’m not enough” – The biggest disease affecting humanity

In this talk, Marisa Peer opens our eyes to the powerful connection that exists between thoughts about ourselves, our health, wealth and quality of life. You are enough. Pretty enough, intelligent enough, talented enough, strong enough, courageous enough…

You are enough.

Searching for love to escape ourselves Hayley Quinn

This wonderful talk by Hayley Quinn helps us realize that romantic love and the pursuit of it can be a form or escapism, simply an excuse not to deal with the real issues we have with ourselves.


Niko Everett: Meet yourself: A user’s guide to building self

“You need to meet yourself. If you could meet yourself, you might really like her!”

Allow me to finish this article off with a radical thought from one of my favorite books, “The Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz”- In this book, the author uses the analogy of a magical kitchen to illustrate the importance of self-love.

He compares self-love to having a magical kitchen inside of us, if you had a magical kitchen in which you could produce all the most delicious meals you can think of, you’d never starve but most importantly, you’d never allow anyone to dictate to your being you while using food as the reward.

No one would come and offer you food in exchange for control over your life, your habits, and your decisions. However, if the situation were reversed, and you had no food, you’d allow anyone and everyone to control everything about your life.

This is the same with self-love; when you have a deep love and respect for yourself, you won’t let others control you, use you or even abuse you. A person might come offering love in exchange for control but you won’t let them in.


“But what is going to happen if you are starving for love, if you don’t have that love in your heart, and someone comes and says, “You want a little love? You can have my love if you just do what I want you to do.”

If you are starving for love, and you taste that love, you are going to do whatever you can for that love. You can even be so needy that you give your whole soul just for a little attention.

Your heart is like that magical kitchen. If you open your heart, you already have all the love you need.

There’s no need to go around the world begging for love: “Please, someone love me. I’m so lonely, I’m not good enough for love; I need someone to love me, to prove that I’m worthy of love.”- A mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz.

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